audio. optional action.

[hairgels]

Hi, everybody. I'm not sure who exactly I'm speaking to or how this works, but I'm new here and I have a favor to ask you all.

I know this is a lot to ask for, but does anybody have any clothes I could borrow? Clothes for a guy, I mean. I'm, uh-- Well I feel ridiculous right now and I'd really like to change out of what I'm wearing.

[For those of you who don't make a habit of checking your compact or who might be out and about already, you might find Blaine trying to find something remotely masculine to change into, even if it means trudging through the snow. Judging from this pretty little number and these heels, he hasn't had any luck yet.]

Comments

forgive my erroneous ways, senpai

[hairgels]

And I live next to Barbra Gordon.

[he got dumped outside the gap so it's k] Lacoste is known mostly for its active wear. It's the one with the crocodile logo.

[He raises a brow. Like. Right now? That would be Kinda Rude. But Stiles is obviously waiting for him to do it so he sets to doing that.]

all is forgiven

[hypercompetent]

I'm pretty sure she's not here, actually, but bonus points for the comic book nerd. We've got a couple other superheroes though. You're in Lilac, so you're...in the same neighborhood as me. And Sansa. And a talking horse.[Because he and Scott are pretty much on the same wavelength. You don't even have to assume that they're having a conversation to know that they know the same information. It's that intense.]

...Riiight. [Smiling and nodding.

But he waits for Blaine to read, linking his hands and resting his chin on them.] Well?

muchos grassy ass

[hairgels]

[He sighs a little bit after reading it, saying in a startling I-told-you-so voice:] It doesn't say anything about Sansa Stark, talking horses, or crossdressing in here.

de nahda

[hypercompetent]

Oh my godddd.

[You literally get the most dramatic eyeroll in the history of ever, Blaine.]

What does it say, smart guy.

[hairgels]

[He's patient, restraining a sigh or a eyeroll of his own.]

Since you're so adamant about it, I'm just going to read it.

[BRIGHT CHEERY VOICE] Welcome to Arcanarum! [energy instantly fizzling] The Rulers would like to thank you for stepping in to replace Karen, -- [looking up] I know that story. She's from the Red Shoes. -- and as such have provided you with residence in the Lilac district. [He waves his hand to motion to his housing in the background. See, Stiles?]

You are the first of your household to join us, so make sure to prepare for the arrivals of your future companions! [there's a small, kind of private smile there and an unintended pause] You'll find everything you need and more in your new home, including a mirror for communication and a key to the front door on your nightstand. [Which he digs out of his pocket and shows.] So far, so good.

If you find yourself in need of anything that we have not provided, then hopefully you can locate these items in the-- In the market to the north of the island. [He trails off there, tapping the letter to the compact.]

Okay, okay. I get it. I should have read it more carefully. In my defense, asking was quicker and easier than finding out where that is.

[hypercompetent]

[Stiles inhales noisily as he starts to read the entire letter out loud, but sits and listens to the whole thing. Blaine is kind of obnoxious...but kind of in a good way? This is really weird.

Whatever. As he finishes, he shrugs.] You're just lucky it was us who answered you and not the creepy Joker dude that runs around and causes havoc every couple of weeks. To make a long story short, the Rulers are dicks, the island is full of other people who have no interest in being fairy tales, and the magical wishing for things thing is about the only cool thing about being here, but even that has a catch.

[hairgels]

And that would be?

[hypercompetent]

You can't wish for anything that's actually yours. So like say you had a bowtie that was like...hell, I don't know, a lucky bowtie or something. If you wished for it, it would show up for like a minute and then disappear. So no pictures of your family, no special items of clothing, nothing like that. The only reason I have this--[He pinches the side of his red hoodie, lifting it up to be seen] Is because I literally went through what's going to give me probably several years of post traumatic stress disorder and all I got was this lousy ironic reminder of my humanity.

Two, you can't wish for technology. I tried to wish for my Mac and it blew up in my face. Literally.

[hairgels]

[nodding] Got it. No wishing for anything personal or useful.

[and then a wistful sigh because that is kind of tough. how does he get his music. or costumes. or hairgel.]

So what do they expect us to do here then? Besides the whole denizen thing. Because I'm really not looking forward to dressing up in that again.

[hypercompetent]

[blaine your life sounds terrible how will you manage without your hairgel

...........]

That...that's actually a really great question? I mean, they don't bother us all that often. I guess we're just supposed to sit here and live life while they turn us into women.

[SIGH.]

Obviously we're trying to get out.

[hairgels]

Great. Just...great.

[because becoming a woman has been his lifelong dream]