arcanarum | sixth repair - [ dream ] He is the sunlight... but the sun is gone.

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sixth repair - [ dream ] He is the sunlight... but the sun is gone.

[ It's a dark graveyard. The sky is full of gloomy purle-ish clothes. Although it's only afternoon, the lightning indicates night. In front of a grave, there is Madoka. Never before she had looked smaller. The girl is staring at a fresh grave, her fists clenched tightly. She is breathing properly, but each and every breath seems to take her a great afford. She just stares, her eyes blank.
It's not something she could believe... She had seen him fall. On the top of this building... he was holding on to it... and then it broke. Madoka had seen him fall. Her best friend. The one who should have saved them all. She had seen him fall, hundredth meters... right into death.
Her own scream echoed in her head. She had not known she could scream like that. After that the world had fallen to darkness. And Madoka had not been able to do anything but assist his father with organizing the funeral. Like a bad dream.
Madoka's eyes traced the name again. 'Ginga Hagane'. Her tiny shoulders began to tremble, finally, it had taken her way too long. ]

..uh...

[ Ginga... He had believed in this world, he had believed in friendship, in them all. Ginga, who had never given up. Ginga, who had a smile brighter than the sun. Ginga, who easily pulled people with him. Ginga, who had just seen his father again. Ginga, the boy who had loved hamburgers a lot... Ginga... Madoka Amano's very best friend. ]

uh... uh.... G-ginga... what should we... do now?

[ And then her legs weren't able to hold her anymore, a little girl who had lost her first real friend. The tears started to roll and Madoka couldn't suppress anything any longer. She just had to let go, shaking horribly and crying, crying, crying. ]

Ginga... Ginga... Giiiiingaaaaaaaaa..... uh....

[ What kind of place was this world? What kind of story was this? It wasn't fair. With Ginga gone they couldn't protect the world anymore... but Madoka had not understood that yet. At least they had let them bury the body... at least that... ]

...ngh... uh.... I-i'm s-scared... C-come back....

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[Even with the momentary disorientation, he'd only been in his for a few minutes; it was a trick he'd used on far too many people himself to not recognize it used on himself - and he'd been dead and a Mist user for far too long to not expect that vivid of a reliving of a certain attack to be a trick.]

[Of course, being able to reject an illusion and having his powers back to get fully free of that limbo were two different things; he wasn't going to be able to get out on his own. Even if he did, he had few enough people that might be useful in getting away from the Rulers as it was; letting them gain any ground was something he couldn't allow. Between tactics and the idea of spiting the Empress of her prey, this meant he was going to be ... uncharacteristically "benevolent", if not really in the greatest mood.]

[And the first person he managed to find ... was apparently getting something similar thrown in their face, even if, knowing her usual attitude, he suspected the whole thing was a lie.]

[He hadn't entered the dream far behind her.]

There's no need to be afraid. This isn't real.

[ Madoka looked up and stared at him, still sniffing and sobbing. ]

I... s-saw him fall... He was... it was... so high.

[ She wanted to think this wasn't real, she wanted to so badly, but she couldn't. It defied logic... she had seen it. With her own eyes.
In her confusion she didn't even wonder why Spade was here though. She just couldn't comprehend many things at once right now. ]

[However questionable his motives were, he was well aware of at least how to not make things worse; he gave a short pause to stifle any impatience and quiet that urge to find the Empress and rip her face off. He understood all too well how much emotional attacks could be just as deadly as physical ones; after all, he'd used that to his advantage in the past.]

[He walked over quietly, kneeling to drape part of the woolen cape over her, with a hand on her shoulder gently - if he left her in this kind of state, there'd be no hope of her being even calm enough to wake up, and right now, that meant she needed at least something stable and safe-seeming to turn to.]

[ It was the comfort she needed. Someone was there, living, breathing right next to her. Without any thoughts about it she let herself fall against Spade's legs a bit, needing another bit of time to cry. She just didn't know what to do. Ginga had been what kept them all moving forward, her first real and true friend and the most powerful of them all. They needed him to lift the darkness from this world again. And she missed him. Terribly so.

It took her a while to calm down, but finally the sobs silenced and she tried wiping the tears from her eyes, even though they had yet to fully stop. A bit helplessly she looked up at Spade. ]

[He shifted his hand enough to support her, staying mostly quiet through it except for a few small murmurs of comfort - they'd managed to get hold of her solidly, and she'd need it to break free.]

[He stayed with the cloak over her and an arm around her; if he played into their nightmare, he risked reinforcing it, but it was going to take a lot of care to lead her out of it - a bread-crumb trail of ideas and memories to prove the image false, made a bit harder that he didn't know her past that well to know how much they'd changed.]

Madoka - do you remember me?

[ She looked up at him and nodded slowly. ]

Of course... I do...

[ And a bit of awareness mixed into her despair. She knew him, but how did all this match? There was something illogical, but it faded before she could grasp it properly. She felt so numb. ]

[That was a start - a tiny start, but a start nonetheless; a bit of patience with even the smallest seed was all he'd need.]

[He kept a calm, level, soothing tone, keeping her close with the cloak over her.]

I need you to think - I know it's hard, and it might not feel like it's important right now, but you need to remember where we met.

[ 'Thinking isn't hard to me usually' Madoka thought, but in her current state Spade's words were very true. Drawing connections was hard when she could see those horrible things flash through her head all the time...
But answering questions was easier. ]

We met on Arcanarum, the fairytale island...

[ The one that didn't match with her current situation. Madoka's red puffy eyes blinked as her intellect tried to find a way through the emotions. ]

[He nods; emotions are funny things that way - get them strong enough and they override reason, enough that even someone who's expecting an illusion could be trapped, much less someone who wasn't...]

Do you remember the Rulers?

[That "not matching" was good - the wedge that would weaken the nightmare.]

[ Madoka gave another nod and wiped away the last tears from her eyes. It didn't make her look any less miserable but at least a tiny bit more determined. ]

I remember them... I recall how badly they treated us...

[Slow progress was progress - she was young, and he had no idea if she'd ever encountered something like this before.]

Do you remember the battle - and the castle?

The battle was horrifying...

[ She shudders thinking further. ]

But at the castle we met The World and finally got a few answers... and then...

[ Wait. Waitwaitwait. ]

No, more importantly... Why are you here, at this place and world?

[There you go - that's a clever girl.]

Because the one who interrupted has trapped everyone in nightmares; I'm familiar with techniques like that, got out of mine, and came looking for others.

Knowing you before, I'd wager this illusion isn't even how things actually happened.

[ Madoka looked at the gravestone and the name that was written on it. 'There is no way Ginga would die' was what she had told herself and if this was true... No, she needed to focus and get her memories in line. ]

..nightmares? But it seems so real...

[ But she had never known this in Arcanarum. As she arrived there it had already all been over. Ginga had not died, she would've remembered that... she would have... ]

You're right. I-it's not actually been like this. I remember that Ginga had been close to falling, but he didn't. He never fell.

[ She felt a bit like making delusional excuses for a horrible truth, but Spade was right here and said the same. The girl stood up shakily, trying to wipe the dirt of her knees. ]

So none of this is real..?

[ She couldn't really believe it yet. Everything sounded just so crazy. ]

[As long as she'd gotten to the realization that it wasn't real, they were basically out of the woods; it was just a matter of getting a good enough grip on it to manage to wake up, which should just be a matter of time - and a point where there's definitely an undercurrent of renewed confidence... for managing to undo their illusions without even having his powers.]

[He stood himself, still staying close - keeping as much of a reminder of his presence as possible.]

There's people with powers like this in my world; the more they can get you to believe it and react, the more power the effect has - give it too much power and it can be "real", or at least real enough to harm.

They tried it with me as well; it's all a lie, another of their attempts at hurting us all. [Not ... that he felt like going into what his was.]

[ It wasn't real. It wasn't real. The longer Madoka repeated the thought the more beautiful it sounded. ]

Illusionary powers?

[ In another situation she would be just so interested. ]

So if I follow right I really just need to... stop believing in this?

[He nodded; it was the basic idea, at least.]

It can take some effort - where I'm from at least, being completely rid of an illusion requires a battle of wills with the illusionist...

But it does seem that these bubbles can be "rejected" if there's enough will behind them, and will to hold onto what's real.

.... I see...

[ She takes another look around ]

It's pretty hard though, I'm standing right here after all... I can feel everything. Even if I believe you, a part of me still doesn't.

[ She was willing to try and reject this not!reality though, there was nothing she would rather do ]

That's what makes an illusion dangerous even to people who know what they're facing - that they can make your own senses lie to you to give them power.

[He gives her shoulder a gentle squeeze with one hand - a physical reminder of his presence.]

Focus on what you know is false about it, and what the reality is. I don't belong here at all, and you remember how things actually went; the flaws will weaken it, and even if your senses are deceiving you, faith in what you know to be real will push it back.

[He knew he'd gotten out as easily thanks to long practice and experience, and that it could be incredibly difficult for someone with no familiarity with it...but as couched as it was in belief, the stronger she believed she was against it, the more likely she'd overcome it, enough that warning her how hard it could be to overcome a powerful illusion would be counterproductive.]

[ The things that were wrong... A world completely wrong. Madoka stared at the grave. ]

This world is wrong... There is no way... There is no way Ginga would die. There is no way this reality could happen. Even if he has no way to win, even when at a complete loss, Ginga turns things around. That's how he is... And when he falls he gets up.
There is no way he wouldn't have stopped this. There is absolutely no way Ginga could die.

So by logical deduction, this must be fake.

[ Saying it all out loud felt better than just keeping it in her head. She recalled memories. Ginga's smile, her and her friends all together, Ginga winning, winning, winning. And then Arcanarum, all the faces she'd gotten to know, friends she'd made, friends she'd lost. G, France, Ange... That was her reality right now.]

[It was the right direction, to be sure... or well, one that would work for now. As much as he knew it was an illusion, and it'd only been brief, the short reminder of Elena's death still stung, and made it all the closer to him that there'd been a time where that kind of faith in someone else had come from him - before everything went wrong and Primo had folded.]

[This was neither the time nor the place for his cynicism and morbidity; even if she was set up for as harsh a lesson as the one he'd learned, that trust in Ginga was something strong enough to get them out, and the nightmare did seem to be weakening.]

And once we've found a way past the rulers, you'll be seeing them again.

[Not "if", but "when" - for all the ideals he'd lost, some Vongola habits never broke.]

I know... I really want to see everyone again.

[ 'Everyone' included her Arcanarum friends, too, which made things rather complicated, but for now she would not think about it ]

In the real world.

[ Madoka couldn't really describe what 'waking up' usually felt like in the mornings, but this must have been a similar sensation. ]

[With the nightmare fading away, the "black space" broken up by other bubbles here and there was a welcome sight - one small victory over the Rulers.]

[Even if it was also grating on his nerves, since every reflex of his was to will some kind of surface to stand on into existence and do something to claim the space, none of which were functioning at the moment; it was the kind of annoyance that he'd just have to suffer through, having that black has a constant reminder that something he'd had his entire life wasn't there.]

You did it... you're free of it.

[ Her eyes widened as she suddenly was practically floating and a short moment she flailed about it, but only a second after she caught herself, letting out a deep sigh of relief... ]

Thank goodness... It's over...

[ She looks up at Spade, smiling ]

And thank you! I really-... I really don't know if I had been able to get out on my own...

[At least the environment was something perfectly familiar to Spade, as much as it was something he'd usually be the one constructing... and it was still grating that he couldn't DO anything with it.]

It's quite alright - I wouldn't expect anyone unfamiliar with that sort of power to know how to handle it, and I doubt any of us are going to best the Rulers on our own skills alone.

Still, I'm glad you came to help me.

[ And naturally this earns Spade a higher rank on her list of friends. He just got her out of something awful after all ]

[Honestly, under the circumstances, this is a good thing, besides just Spade's pragmatism. ~~You may be one of the first people here with a good shot at working on his conscience.~~]

[He does nod slightly to that, before looking up and around at the other bubbles.]

If only it'd just been the two of us; it looks like quite a few others are having difficulties.

[ Well, it would've been weird if it had just been them... Madoka looks around for a bit, feeling an ache in her chest at seeing people she really liked in so much trouble. Then she stops and her eyes widen in panic ]

....G!

[There is, possibly, a very brief, momentary blink and poker-face fail that he's playing off as a start-and-pause at her sudden exclamation; this suddenly got WORLDS more awkward. Of course, she lived in the same house, she'd have to know G, and it wasn't like G would have a reason to be a complete dick to a girl her age.]

[Well, time to play this off.]

Ah - right. He is from the same world I am, so he should have some experience with this kind of assault...

[At the same time, this was G. He's still a little amazed the man managed to get away that last time, considering...]

...But his track record at shaking off illusions is a little hit or miss.

[Well, maybe he could work this to his advantage... after all, if he saved G, then maybe that debt would be enough to lower the odds of him being shot for going near the house. Maybe.]

I can try to help, but you may have to do most of the talking - we've had a few fights in the past, and he may not want to listen to me.

[And from the tone, you'd almost think he was talking about an argument over lunch or owing money...]

[ Madoka didn't care if G was used to this or not. He was her friend and she'd do anything to help a friend in need, that was what her latest experiences had taught her and what she was very willing to live after. ]

I don't think there's much of a better time to forget about fights than this! But if you don't want to talk much, then I suppose it's fine. But please come with me. You know a lot more about this than I do.

[Well, this was going to be ... awkward.]

I'll see what I can do ... it really would be better for you to do most of the talking, but I will help where I can. [And he was already scanning the bubbles; wherever G was, it would at least be familiar to Spade.]

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sixth repair - [ dream ] He is the sunlight... but the sun is gone.

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